Number One: The FANFREAKINTASTIC
This one's pretty self explanatory and almost as good as it gets, well, it could get better but we want to keep it real and family friendly...
Okay, that's a lie, and I really highly doubt I'll live to that reputation, but in the chance the maja ever decides to read this or some Sunday School acquaintance comes out of the wood works, I'll at least have some shred of "dignity".
Fuck it, now I want to change it.
On to Number Two: The SUH-WEET
as in," DUDE!!!!"
"NO, SUH-WEET!"
Now for Number Three: The FANNYPACK
What could have been amazing a few years ago and short of a cure-for-cancer awesome, now is just not so cool. Rather, it is best to keep under wraps away from the public and never shown again unless you are deep in the wilderness eating astronaut gel and carving your own weapons to hunt for goat meat.
Number Four: The BIRKENSTOCK WITH SOCKS
Impractical.
Never was cool.
Never will be cool.
We snicker behind your back.
For your own sake,
STOP.
Number Five: The FOREHEAD VAGINA
Enough said.
Hope this clarifies, makes you feel like a new man or woman or both,
now off to enjoy SNL with Will Ferrell and Green Day...
Honestly could be the best part of my day/night.
Muahahahahaha.....
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